Letter to AIG

Tell these assholes what you think about the AIG bonuses. Here's what I wrote to these necrophiliac, grave-robbing swine at AIG:

Hello AIG,

I now know what your acronym stands for: Arrogant Ignorant Ghouls. Your performance in recent memory has been so abominable, so poor, so egregiously hideous, reprehensible and of such a sickening depth of ineptitude, incompetence, as well as a level of greed, selfishness and hate-of-one's-country that it would make Satan himself blush. Your wretchedness will be remembered and reviled for centuries.

The executives and traders and vampires who have gotten AIG into the woeful, embarrassing, maddening monetary miasma in which it now sits like swine in a jacuzzi of manure, should be denied their bonuses. They should lose their employment immediately. They should be investigated for wrongdoing because it's so blindingly obvious that something nefarious and illegal, unethical and immoral was loose like a syphilitic gorilla in gilded AIG.

But there are a few things AIG executives should gain. They should be given orange jumpsuits. They should be given trials before military tribunals as enemy combatants. They should each be given their own black pillowcase, placed over top of their heads by the gentle hands of a member of the American military. They should then be given new homes -- in Guantanamo Bay, Cuba.

AIG is an economic terrorist organization. AIG employees are economic terrorists.

AIG should be dismantled brick by brick, crook by crook, and salt spread all over the land where it once sat, just as was done in Sodom and Gomorrah so many years ago.