Monday, September 27, 2010

Kim Yong Il insists his son was elevated to the rank of general based on his own merits



A shameless example of nepotism was ratified in North Korea today when Kim Yong-Il's son Kim Yong-Un was promoted to the rank of general.

The American State Department was quick to issue a response to the move saying, "This is one of the many reasons why North Korea will never move forward and join the rest of the world in the 21st Century. They don't share Americans' work ethic or respect for those who make their own way in life without the help of powerful friends or family members. Kim Yong-Un was born on third base and thinks he hit a triple."

Kim Yong-Il praised his son and said the promotion was based upon his son's own merits, having slain numerous dragons, defeating several powerful wizards and inventing a cure for cancer (which the West will never see!).

The promotion was celebrated with a rare, open-air performance of How to Succeed in Business Without Really Trying in Pyong Yang.

5 comments:

Not York Material 9 said...

Nice work! I think I may have sensed a slight tone of sarcasm though?!?

Whetam Gnauckweirst said...

Read The Onion if you want sarcasm. You'll only get hard news and insightful commentary here!

Macphisto said...

It's amazing how much Kim Yong's son looks like Chevy Chase.

John C said...

The title of the article refers to Kim Yong-il (the Prime Minister of North Korea from 2007 to 2010) but shows a picture of Kim Jong-il (the Dear Leader of North Korea from 1994 to 2011).

Whetam Gnauckweirst said...

John C., it's a North Korean mystery.