Monday, May 02, 2011

Osama Bin Oswald is Dead: High Fives All 'Round American Psy-ops Shops

In a coincidence so contrived it might have come out of a James Cameron film, American psy-ops (psychological operations) technicians have finally pulled the plug on their most successful bogeyman yet: Osama Bin Laden.

With waning support of its foreign wars, declining confidence in its intelligence community, the American public was ripe for the latest psy-ops coup.

As the 10th anniversary of the September 11, 2001 attacks approaches, and along with it a raft of uncomfortable questions as to why American forces and intelligence could not track down the deed's so-called "mastermind", today's announcement of the death of Osama Bin Laden closes the book on this precarious chapter of America.

"With Bin Laden gone," says a member of CIA's psy-ops team who asked not to be named, "we can now move some of our other projects to frighten the American people to the front burner."

Of course, the body of Osama Bin Laden was immediately buried at sea, so the world must simply take America's word for this intelligence/military success story.

Just as the world had to take America's word about Iraq's stores of weapons of mass destruction back in 2003.

Were fingerprints or dental records used to positively identify the body as that of Osama Bin Laden?

"Fingerprints and dental are for CSI and Forensic Factor," said a senior, unnamed, military official. "In the military, we go with our gut!"

On this point, our CIA psy-ops source was sanguine. "Frankly, we don't care what the rest of the world thinks. The American people will believe this. They're out celebrating in the streets."

So, what's next for American psy-ops experts?

"We've got a number of very exciting fictional personas to frighten Americans," said our source. "There's 'Clive the Georgia Lout,' kind of a retooled Tim McVeigh for domestic terrorism scenarios. We've got 'Mandingo the Madman of Manchuria.' We see a lot of promise in Manchuria for frightening Americans. And we're most proud of 'Paul the Blogger' on whom we can blame any and all conspiracy theories. Up to now, the American public hasn't had a face for bloggers, so we have high hopes for 'Paul'."

Inside the Hotdog Factory was on the scene at Ground Zero, getting reactions from celebrants.

"Osama Bin Laden is dead!" shouted one man. "Now, I can get a job!"

"I'm making up a list of my remaining freedoms," said a woman, "that I'm prepared to give up after the next terrorist attack by whoever replaces Bin Laden."

And this, from a flag-waving man clad only in a pair of Jockey shorts: "Oooooh ahhhh! Who do you love, baaaaby?"

Highly emotional times.

In other news, Rupert Murdoch can finally make use of the "Death of Osama Bin Laden" theme he commissioned Andrew Lloyd Weber to compose ten years ago.

3 comments:

NotBuyingTheStory9 said...

I can't wait to see Lloyd Webers version of the controlled demolitions! Perhaps an entirely different theater will collapse, jus' so its like the real thing.

Anonymous said...

The Liar in Chief and Ms. Hillary Concoct Dangerous Propaganda Hoax to Boost Their Dismal Poll Numbers

Review the movie Navy Seals...begins with Charlie Sheen passed out drunk, in casual attire, rolling around in the surf at 53rd Street, Virginia Beach, circa 1988. Anyway when this Seal Team went into Lebanon to blow up some hijacked Stinger Missiles, why they video taped and photographed everything. Do you think we will ever get to see the videos and photographs from this Bin Laden mission?

No autopsy on this 54 year old man with renal disease....an old man who may have had a kidney transplant….no fingerprints, no post mortem x-rays, no dental records review...even JFK had skull x-rays done as part of his autopsy....even Kennedy and Lincoln had autopsies done and we knew who they were.....

We don’t need the photos of Bin Laden’s face because we have the photo that tells us the whole story. That is the photo of Obama and Hillary et al watching from the Situation Room ....watching/directing in real time, with the CIA, NSA, etc....two chronic liars spinning a tale about OBL, a guy who may have been dead for years now,

Just when Obama and Clinton are desperately low in the polls and gas is at an all time high. Witness: Obama puppeteers Geithner, Bernanke, Robert Rubin, Alan Greenspan and George Soros have looted most of Americans’ retirement funds, universities endowments, money market funds, etc The only thing they haven't trashed is gold and I hear they are working on a plan confiscate the people’s gold and silver

Do you really trust these people? Navy Seals are great and we should be proud of them But they are not to be sent on some propaganda show mission!

Fact is, we really don't know what happened. The incinerated helicopter makes me uneasy. For all we know there was only one chopper and the Pakistanis shot it down. They may have killed and/or captured our Seals. I just don’t know! All I'm saying, the cock and bull story that the Liar in Chief and Ms. Hillary have concocted is probably far from the truth.

Obama: "I, I, I, me, me, me, my, my, my, I, I, I", just as his bailout and stimulus and dollar inflation plans have all proved to be counterproductive. Anyway, George Soros and a bunch of Wall Street big shots control Obama. Almost everything he has done has been back ass wards…ditto for GHW Bush and his moron son GW Bush. And for Bill Clinton.

New rules: no more coke snorting, drug dealing draft dodgers will be allowed to run for President!


In summary, America spent $1.3 trillion dollars hunting down this guy...and yet no stun grenades were used, no taser was used, no capture, no interrogation, no trial, total disregard for the rule of law upon which this country was founded, no adherence to the Geneva Convention, no dental records, no X rays, no autopsy, no fingerprints, Bin Laden used no safe (panic) room during the attack on his fortress home. And his burial at sea was in contradiction to Islamic tradition.

Wake up America! We deserve some legitimate answers.

George Meredith MD

Virginia Beach

Whetam Gnauckweirst said...

Clearly, the Bin Laden story is bogus, but I think it's extremely short-sighted for anyone to believe this fiction was spun merely to aid President Obama's poll numbers. Obama has shown that it doesn't matter who's voted president -- the travesty of George W.'s wars and dismantling of the Constitution will be preserved.

It's the same short-sightedness that was so sure there would be "terrorist" attacks on the anniversary of 9/11.

Since the blight known as Ronald Reagan came to power, running up patriot deficits by pouring money into the pockets of military contractors.

And finally, and off topic, the bail outs that have you so upset, George, originated with George W. Bush.