Monday, February 07, 2011

New international symbol added to visual lexicon

The International Organization for Standardization announced today that it was designating the business suit as the International Symbol of the Son-of-a-Bitch.

"For the last 75 years, the business suit has come to represent greed, avarice, deceit, obfucscation, war-mongering, spiritual bankruptcy and general Dick Chenery," said Move Jargon, of the IOS communications wing. "Therefore, the IOS in its capacity for designing, recognizing and otherwise designating international symbols recognized around the world, that the suit from this day forward indicate to all who see it: here there be sons of bitches."

The Internationa Order of Suit Wearers were quick to denounce the IOS's decision, saying, "The business suit as we know it has always been and will remain dapper!"

The leaders in the 2011 Tight Necktie Derby attempted to comment on the IOS's announcement, but none could see to draw enough breath to make a statement.

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